Joyfully Clamoring

The Good Fight

February 17, 2022February 17, 2022by Becky Dye1 Comment

There’s a move in the workout I did this morning where we have one hand holding down our imaginary opponent while the other hand pounds up and down, punching this invisible enemy. And the motivating question from the red haired trainer is this…

“What are you fighting for?

And I stand there in my punching stance and think. What is it ? Who or what is my enemy today? What deserves my “wrath” to fall upon it right now? Is it a situation in my life I wish was different? (I am rather mad that my newish expensive dishwasher is making angry noises for the second time in it’s short life!!! GRRR!!) Is it a person I’m super mad at? (Nah, that’s not it. Hard to make me that mad!) Is it the stinky stanky devil getting all up in my business? (That could be! I DO like to punch his imaginary snaky face!) Is it simply an attitude about anything that could stand to improve?

Can we settle THERE for a while? As hard as it is to face our own poor attitudes, don’t we need to? A bad attitude hurts nobody but ourselves. A crummy mindset holds us back from the greater amazing things we truly want. Sometimes we forget that “greater good” thing when our minds are bogged down with the negative. So basically, who has time to mess with a giant chip on the shoulder?? NOBODY,I SAY!! NOBODY!!

So let’s look at ways we can improve here. Things we can punch away at and throw back down into the pit it belongs in!! These are things I’ve lived and mostly conquered. That’s the extent of my expertise here!

1.STOP SHAMING YOURSELF

“I just can’t stay out of the cookies (or the potato chips). I am just gonna be fat forever!”

“I try to make the right food choices, but it’s useless. I’m not worth the effort”

“I’m just too lazy and too weak. Not sure why I even try to work out”

Add your own shaming comment. I’m sure you have one. We’re all guilty of feeling less than from time to time. Shame is an award winning self stopper. But that script can be flipped. If you’re just not sure what to do to change those shameful actions and words, find help. You don’t have to do any of this “getting yourself to a healthy place” stuff by yourself. And there’s no shame in saying you need help. That “easy” place may be continuing to wallow in the shame you’re used to. The STRONG AMAZING thing to do is admit you need some help. So many weight loss groups are available whether virtually or the old fashioned way…live and in person! WW is my fave for weight loss but the choices are endless. Do your research and find a group that will be a good fit for you and offer you tons of encouragement. If you need help with making exercise a part of your life, search out walking groups in your community. Join a gym. Find a great at home workout plan that comes with a “coach” who will support you and encourage you online. We are people who need people. Cue the classic Barbra Streisand song here! According to the song, if you’re a person who needs people, you’re pretty darn lucky. So cast away the pride that might be causing you to hold on to your shame and just ask for help!

2. STOP WITH THE EXCUSES!!

Some excuses I’ve used….

I don’t have time to workout. My hip hurts. My toe hurts. My back hurts. I don’t like to sweat. I just put on my makeup. I don’t have the right clothes. I just need to rest more. I don’t have the right deodorant. I need leg warmers. Exercise is boring. Exercise it too hard. I’m too old. I’m too out of shape. I don’t know what to do. I don’t have any equipment. I can’t afford a gym. I don’t have a a workout buddy.

My list of excuses could cover pages and pages and we just don’t have time for all that. But you get it. I’ve used an excuse or two to get out of exercise. Maybe you have too??

Instead of living in the excuses, try making adjustments .

We all have the same 24 hours in a day. Those folks who manage to do all the things and still get a workout in? 24 hours just like you and me. So what can you adjust to make time? Maybe you can get up 30 minutes earlier and workout before the day starts Maybe you can find some free time where you’d normally sit and read or binge watch a show. Exercise instead. My favorite streaming at home workouts have programs that are as short as 20 minutes a day. Come on! We can all find 20 minutes in a day to workout instead of just sit!!

To answer a few more of my own excuses, modify the exercises if you can’t do them or something hurts. Walk instead of jog. Toe raises instead of leaps in the air. Squats at whatever level of lowness you can get to. Just move. Find something you like if you think exercise is boring (see my previous post about fun and exercise). Shorts and a tee shirt are fine to work out in. Shoot, exercise in your underwear or naked if you must. Just please be at home if this is your solution to the clothes issue. Nobody needs to see your nekkid hiney at the gym or running around the track!! And oh yeah, leg warmers are no longer necessary. Goodbye 1983!

If food is involved in your excuses, know this. IT’S OK TO THROW ALL THE JUNK FOOD IN THE GARBAGE!!! What you spent on it is irrelevant compared to how much easier it will be to avoid if it’s not in your pantry! Better yet, control what you allow in your pantry. Don’t buy the ding dang junk food in the first place. There are zero people in your family who will actually benefit from it. You know I’m right!

On to the next thing…

3.STOP STRESSING OUT

If all the healthy eating and exercising is just causing you to stress and worry and fret and shame yourself, do this instead. Take a break!! Sometimes we just need to reset . Chill. Do nothing. But with this advice to take a break comes this sweet little, love filled warning. Don’t use this break to be an excuse to backslide . Don’t let the break be your new normal. It’s just a “mental health” break. Don’t let it become a “Welcome Back to the Dark Side” party! Maybe give yourself a set number of days for this little vacation away from eating right and exercising. Mark your calendar with a restart date then plan to celebrate that day!

4. STOP COMPARING YOUR REAL SELF TO SOMEONE ELSES BEST MOMENTS

Comparison is a joy killer!! It can give you a sad, unworthy attitude. You don’t need that. You don’t deserve that. You are a unique, beautiful, capable person in your own right. Every person…even the ones who seem to have it all together…have their struggles. If you’re just getting started and it all seems hard, don’t compare yourself to the friend who’s been at this for a hot minute. I guarantee when said friend was where you are, it was every bit as hard. Instead of killing your joy, fuel you spirit with compliments! Every day find something amazing to say about yourself.

“My hair look great today!” “I am a kind, compassionate, loving person!” “I’ve done great things to better myself!”

You get my drift! Be nice to yourself!! Those things you admire in someone else are within you as well. You are WILDLY CAPBABLE!!

On the tail of all these compliments, finally do this…..

5. STOP ALL THE CRITICAL SELF TALK

Why are we always our own worst critics?? WHY???? There’s a saying in the church that goes like this...”GOD DOESN’T MAKE JUNK!!!” YOU, my friend, are fearfully and wonderfully made. Just like that person in point 4 that you, for some reason, like to compare yourself to all the live long day! You are every bit as able. Every bit as worthy. Every bit as loved. Every bit deserving of being celebrated! So instead of all the negative self talk, celebrate your small wins!

The wins in your journey will be many. Hitting that “finish line” by reaching your goal weight or completing the long workout program isn’t the final victory. In fact, let me stop right here and say if you’re striving for that final achievement so you can be done and get back to life as it once was, you’re setting yourself up for a bigger failure. Your “big goal” truly needs to be a changed life. Not just a few changed moments in time where you did the right things. A LIFETIME of putting your health and fitness at the top of your priority list. A LIFETIME of fueling your body properly so it will give you a lifetime of being able to move and groove and love and serve and enjoy the beautiful life God gave you!!

So celebrate all the small victories along the way. You bypassed the dessert table….YAY!!! You walked during lunch instead of going out for fast food …SWEET!! You finally were able to lift the 8 lb weights through your whole workout…TREMENDOUS!!! You’re a pound down!….HURRAY!! You slept through the night…(alright I’m just jealous now!)…but THAT’S SO AWESOME!!

Celebrate like a 7 year old who just won a dance contest with her grandmother at a 4th grade football game!!

Y’all, we may feel like we don’t have control over enough things in our lives. But we always have control over our attitude. We have the freedom to choose how we’ll behave, react, treat ourselves. What we’re not free from is the outcome of our choices. So make sure you’re fighting for the better things. You’re worth it!

Until next time, keep joyfully clamoring!!

Encouragment, Healthy Living

Why Isn’t Exercise More Fun!?

February 4, 2022February 5, 2022by Becky Dye3 Comments

I was 19. Enjoying college life to the best of my abilities. Dorm life was full of friends and so much fun. One of my favorite memories from those days was exercising in the hallway with my group of besties. One of the girls had just gotten the Jane Fonda workout ALBUM and it was hot! We’d all put on our favorite leotards, complete with tights and leg warmers, and we’d line up in the hall on our hands and knees and do all the leg lifts Jane asked us to do. We were amazing! Truly! All this huffing and puffing and aerobic- heart -racing gave me all the confidence I needed to say “yes” when I was asked to join another group of friends in this Texas Tech 10 mile walk-run-jog-a-thon for a cause. I’d get a cute tee shirt I could wear so all the world would know of my great accomplishment. Also, there would be cute boys. The day of the event started with such great excitement and anticipation. THE cute boy I had my eye on would be walk-run-jogging with us. I was sure I’d have his heart by the end of the day. Oh sweet, naive little me! Somewhere in the 8th mile of this 10 mile jaunt through the streets of Lubbock, TX, my digestive system got wind of the fact that I was doing something totally out of character and it was voted by all the other systems in my body to be the one to put all this craziness to a stop! Thankfully, when my stomach decided to stage this revolt against me, we were very near Cute Boy’s house. In a moment of West Texas chivalry ,Cute Boy walked me to his house where I could use his bathroom . I was then picked up by the event EMT’s and took that ride of shame to the finish line in an “ambulance”. That was it for me and Cute Boy. I don’t think I ever saw him again. That was also the end of my relationship with exercise. It was hard and could obviously become humiliating!

Besides a couple of very short gym memberships during times when I forgot how badly I disliked exercise , that was it for me. My hatred for exercise was solid and pretty much immovable. I didn’t like it. Not one little bit. I avoided sweating at all costs. If my heart rate got even a beat above my resting heart rate, I knew it and would immediately rest. So how in the world, at the age of 58 1/2, did I get to place where “rest days” are harder to take than days where a heart pumping workout is my favorite thing to do??

It didn’t happen overnight, that’s for sure. But there are some things I think helped my gradual build up to the place where I’d just as soon do a great workout as I would sit and read a book! Keep reading if you wonder if what I did might help you as well. These are in no particular order …

I FOUND A FORM OF EXCERCISE I LOVE!! It’s true. If you don’t like it, you won’t do it. But I was certain I’d love to be a runner. So I downloaded one of those “please make me a runner because I need to stop sitting on my couch so much” apps. I started with day one on a super cool June day and I was proud that I made it through. But then the next day was a more typical summer day in Georgia and when I attempted day 2, I thought I might die. So I waited a few more days until the next weird summer cold snap and you know what? My body started to remind me why I’m not a runner. I was quickly limping around the track because my wonky toe didn’t like running. My hip kept catching because it didn’t like running. And my motivation waned …because I didn’t like running. As much as I wanted running to be my fun thing, it just wasn’t so I knew I wouldn’t continue with it. I had to find something better for me. The part of me that prefers to stay home because I don’t have to look a certain way or worry about if there’s enough gas in my car or if the traffic will drive me insane, needed something I could just roll out of bed and do. My at home workouts quickly became something I LOVE! Because I love them, they’re super easy to stick with. So find something you can delight in!

2. I STOPPED COMPARING MY JOURNEY TO ANYONE ELSES I didn’t decide to be friends with exercise until I was in my mid-fifties. As I scrolled all the social media and looked around at the people out walking and jogging and hiking, the vast majority of who I saw appeared to be quite a bit younger. And if they were my age, well in my mind they obviously were people who loved exercise all their live long days! I don’t know if they were or not. But they were so good at it. They were all so fit. In the newness of my fitness journey , I could’ve easily fallen into the belief that I needed to be just like them right now. Yesterday even! And it would’ve taken about 10 seconds on an uphill path before I felt like a total failure. Comparison can be a killer of a dream that needs to be a reality!! So to make this all fun and games for me, I started comparing me to me. I kept calendars and trackers for writing down times and reps and weights. I’d compete with my yesterday self and try to up my weights. Competition became fun. And yes, now that I’ve been in this a few years, if I can keep up with one of the trainers, I do shout a big old hallelujah!!!

3. I GAVE MYSELF GRACE TO NOT BE PERFECT!! Lord have mercy!! If I’ve heard it once, I’ve heard it a hundred times…”I’m just not good enough at this so I’m done! I quit!” STOP IT!!! Just stop it!! Feeling the need to be perfect at all the things is just downright stressful. Stress takes you far from any place that is remotely fun! If you can’t do all the moves, do what you can! If you can’t keep up with the pace, big deal! Do it at a pace you can keep up with! If they’re all lifting 15’s and you’re still struggling with 8’s, pull out the 5’s and get on with your bad self. If you’re squats are barely little bends in your knees, great!! You’re still moving!!! In this grace to not be perfect, I also gave myself permission to modify as needed. Modifying is not a not sign of imperfection or weakness! Modifying actually shows how STRONG your resolve to get it done in spite of it all is!! Modifying a hard workout brings the fun back to it!! This is because a workout you can actually do is 100% more fun than one you just stand and watch with your hands on your hips wondering what the heck is going on!!!

Sometimes I even modify the stretches. Gotta hold on!!

4. I FOUND FRIENDS WHO LIKE TO WORKOUT. I’m a big old introvert at heart but one who still likes to be with people! I love to hike with my husband and friends. But my favorite way to exercise with people is right from the privacy of my living room! My at home workouts are something I look forward to every day. Whichever program I’m working through, I seem to always “bond” with someone in the cast..my workout buddies! It’s usually the modifier or the non-modifier who seems to be on the struggle bus a little bit!! In this day and age of social media, I also have a group of people who meet in a Facebook group every day to talk about the workout of the day. We all mostly do the same workouts and we try to stay on the same day of whatever program we’re working through. We’ll post pictures of ourselves after we survived all the exercise torture of the day and we encourage and motivate each other along the way. We show grace to each other and don’t expect perfection! It works. Plus the accountability is great! And it’s fun!

5. I PRAYED FOR MY MINDSET ABOUT EXERCISE TO CHANGE SO I COULD SEE IT AS FUN!! I guess I saved the most important, best thing for last here on my little list. If you know me in real life, you know how important my faith and prayer is to me. Being a woman past mid-life who had never ever ever liked exercise, I knew it would be hard to teach this old dog any new tricks! I knew if my mindset on exercise were to ever change, it would take a flat out act of God. So I prayed, “Lord You know me better than I know myself. And I know myself hates exercise. It’s uncomfortable and sweaty and it hurts. But I know I need to do it. I know it’s important now more than ever. I feel like if I don’t get my hiney in gear now and make exercise a part of my life, it’s only gonna get harder to make it happen. I’m not getting any younger. This won’t get any easier. So I need Your help ! Change my heart and my attitude here. I need this to be fun!!! Please and thank You! ” Then the important part….I BELIEVED HE’D DO IT!! I did my part. He did His. And voila! I never thought in my lifetime I’d ever mutter the words “I LOVE EXERCISE”. But there you go. I love it. I crave it. If I skip a day, I miss it. Whodathunk??

What on my list can you do today? What has made exercise fun for you? I’d love to hear your answers. And if you need a group of friends to come along side you and make exercise fun, let me know and I can get you plugged in to my Facebook group (if you’re a Facebook person!)

Until then, Keep Joyfully Clamoring!!

Devotions

But There’s No Snow

December 23, 2021December 23, 2021by Becky DyeLeave a Comment

He was 3 ½ and finally at that age where he understood what Christmas was all about. Or at least that’s what I thought! When I woke him up that Christmas morning…..yes, I’ve actually had to wake up kids on Christmas morning….he took one look out the window and decided I had completely pulled his leg.

“Mommy, it’s not Christmas! There’s no snow!”

960215_10152098584825856_618937356_n — Not THAT Christmas morning but A Christmas morn

He actually then attempted to crawl back into bed! Yep….not making that up. My 3 ½ year old child had to be coerced into traversing the stairs down into the living room where Christmas had exploded all over the place. His first “sign” of Christmas had failed. He had no reason to believe Santa had actually shown up because, well, how in creation would Santa’s sleigh traverse the dry, dead grass that covered our yard and everyone elses. He simply needed to see to believe.

Faith had yet to give him vision.

Four hundred years had passed. No word from God. No burning bushes. No parting seas. No visits from angelic strangers. Nothing. Zilch. Nada. This world was God-silent for 400 years. Y’all…that’s a L O N G time!! It’s many, many lifetimes. Many generations. I’ve gone through periods of my life where I felt God was ignoring me or wasn’t there…..but it was a period of a few months. Not years. I always managed to crawl my way back to Him only to find He really never left my side. During that 400 year period so many years ago, God was just silent. I can only imagine how the people during that time felt. And I don’t imagine it was pretty. How many let their faith completely fall because there was no evidence of God’s presence ? How many worshiped other things since God was not around? How many lead lives desperate for something more, something Bigger than them?

Faith needed to give them vision.

And I have to wonder, how did anyone manage to hang on to the faith of their predecessors with so many years of God silence? It would be so much easier to slip into the ways of the world and totally forget the things of faith.

But then it happened to a family who had somehow managed to not let too much of their world sneak in and damage their hearts. A family who had managed to hang on to their faith and find favor with God…

“The time came quiet…

All the glory had been left in heaven.

And the face of God turns one last time in the waters of the womb, and the membrane breaks and the amniotic fluid leaks and the skin of God slips naked and small into holy hands He made.

The birth of God – who can find words?” ……(from The Greatest Gift by Ann Voskamp)

The years of God silence were broken by the cries of a baby. And our faith was given vision once again. Through a baby who would be King. A baby who would save. A baby whose life would show the world for the rest of eternity how to love…how to hope.

On this Christmas, know that whether there is snow on the ground or not, whether there are copious amounts of gifts under the tree for you or just one, whether you are surrounded by family or it’s just you, the only true sign of Christmas is all around us.

Emmanuel…God with us. God around us, waiting with open arms to lavish his love on you not only this Christmas but every…single…day!

Merry Christmas Friends!

Healthy Living

Which Beachbody Programs Are The Best

December 21, 2021by Becky Dye2 Comments

I did my first Beachbody workout in July of 2019. I was four months and 35 pounds into my 80 pound weight loss goal. I had been doing some at home walking workouts but that’s about it. I was in better shape than I was four months before but was I “fit”? Not yet. I still had quite a ways to go before I would qualify myself as anywhere near physically fit. Gotta say, that in those first days of trying workouts that involved more than just marching in place and lifting my knees, I was a bit intimidated. A lot intimidated even. But with that intimidation came determination. So I set my mindset in a good, positive , happy place and I pretended I had been a stud exercise warrior all my life!! Nothing could’ve been further from the truth. Mindset is key,though. I was able to successfully “fake it till I made it”. Here I am around the time I started my first full Beachbody program…..

It didn’t take much time of just pretending I enjoyed my workouts. Something clicked inside me quickly. I started seeing results that I liked. My weight loss continued but most importantly, I noticed how much stronger I was feeling, physically and emotionally. I enjoyed these gym-like workouts in the comfort of my own home. I didn’t have to give one thought to what everyone was thinking of me while I exercised because I was alone in my living room. I could give it MY all without trying to complete with some random stranger’s all! I actually started to have FUN working out…two words I never thought I’d put together in the same sentence. In January of 2021, I decided I loved Beachbody so much, I’d try my hand as a coach. I love encouraging and motivating others to be the best version of themselves. To watch the lightbulbs go off as someone realizes they’re capable of far more than they imagined. It’s a delight for me to walk side by side with others as we share workout successes and challenges, nutrition advice, and tips on how to get in all the ding dang water!! Oh the water!! Why is it so hard to drink all the water?!?

As a Beachbody coach, there are two questions I get asked the most when someone is just starting out. One...which program is your favorite? And two...where should I start? These are such loaded questions for me because, well, choosing the one I’ve liked the most is similar to having to choose which of my kids is my favorite!! They’re all my favorite!! Each of the Beachbody workout programs I’ve done has had something I loved.

And as to where to start? Just jump in!!! I’ll often suggest doing the sample workout for a few different programs and go with the one that jives with you the most. I started with one I felt would meet me at my fitness level at the time . I knew of Kathy Smith from workouts of hers I had done many years earlier. I found her in a section of classic workouts on Beachbody on Demand and may have squealed. But it took me about 60 seconds to realize I had outgrown good old Kathy and needed something newer. So I moved on. Since all I’d been doing was walking, I figured a workout that was just dancing would work for me. Especially one that was dancing to country music…brought me right back to my Texas roots and the early 80’s when I spent hours two stepping and line dancing on dark dance floors in college town bars! Country Heat was fun; however, it reminded me of how terribly uncoordinated I am and the term “two left feet” kept jumping to mind! I basically nailed the first workout over the course of a week before I threw in the towel and needed something different. (I’ve since revisited Country Heat and have managed a few other dances. They really are fun once you get the hang of it!) My daughter suggested 21 Day Fix. It looked scary. It used dumb bells…I had a set of 2 lb weights. It had cardio and pilates and yoga. I just wasn’t sure about it to be honest. But I put on my big girl pants and just did it. And you know what? I LIKED IT!! This was the very first program I completed and by the end of the 21 days, I was hooked. I had bumped my weights up and purchased a set of 5’s and 8’s. 10’s and 12’s weren’t far behind. I learned that I LOVED strength training. I learned that I could do cardio exercises and not actually die. I learned that I love the way I feel after I’ve accomplished a workout that I once thought was too hard.

So I kept on. 80 Day Obsession…Morning Meltdown 100…Liift 4… 10 Rounds…Transform 20…#MBF and #MBFA…Let’s Get Up…3 Week Yoga Retreat…9 Week Control Freak. These have all been soooo good but there are three programs that I’ve repeated multiple times. My faves. Here they are in no particular order…

Morning Meltdown 100 introduced me to a fiery red haired trainer who made me believe for the first time how WILDLY CAPABLE I was. She made me see that modifying exercises was OK. With two different modifiers in this program, I learned many different ways to take a hard move and make it easier without taking away it’s effectiveness. You DON’T have to take a burpee all the way to the floor!!!Who knew? That may have been life changing for me! One hundred days of cardio meltdown, upbeat strength, core inferno, total body badass, downbeat strength, freestyle flow, LIT cardio, FIGHT CLUB (I can’t talk about that one!), re-vibe. When that hundredth workout was complete, I stood in front of my TV in my living room turned gym and just let the tears flow. I truly felt accomplished in a way I never had before. I would never have imagined that I could get my 50-something year old self to do a move like this lightening bolt thing….yet there I was doing it.

2. #MBF and #MBFA were the second two programs I completely fell in love with. They are both three weeks long. #MBFA is a smidge more advanced than its predecessor. “Megan Minutes” are added, making #MBFA longer and a little more challenging. But you’ll be ready for the challenge! Each workout is set to music, which I learned in MM100 I LOVE! I am just a music loving gal for sure! Working out to a beat just always feels easier and more fun to me than simply listening to a trainer talk. This was the first workout program that included a cast doing the workout alongside the trainer, Megan, from the comforts of their own homes. Thank you 2020. I actually sorta loved this. The cast members were likeable and varied in age from 20’s to 60’s. Exercising alongside a couple in their 60’s was inspiring to me! The program includes seven different workouts a week, all including weight lifting and cardio, with the exception of the dynamic recovery day. I was introduced to a few new terms….AMRAP(as many rounds as possible) and EMOM (every minute on the minute)…and learned what it truly means to be your own best competition as you try to beat your own record from the last AMRAP workout. It was during these two “sister” programs, that I started seeing a bit of definition in my shoulders and arms! I never knew how much I’d appreciate a toned upper body. As I stood in my living room turned gym at the end of #MBFA, the tears flowed. Again. The celebrations by the cast and trainer at the end of a program will never get old or fail to move me.

3. 9 Week Control Freak may be my actual numero uno, top favorite of all time. And it’s one I avoided like the plague when it first came out. It had strange equipment I knew nothing about and didn’t have. I needed a door in my workout space to attach this necessary door track. A track that seemed like a pain to install. I work out in my living room . No door. But then I saw what my daughter was using instead of the track. It didn’t attach to a door . It just hung on the door and moved easily up and down the door frame with an open and close of the door. I rethought all the things and felt I could use the door in my front foyer for this band system. I could buy the resistance band door thingie (not it’s technical name!), a step and a core ball for a small investment. So with a different outlook on 9WCF, I bought all the things and dove in. Holy Cow!!! All that equipment that had scared me and made me not even consider this program became what I ADORE about it . SO! MUCH! FUN! Seriously! The resistance band door thingie is a game changer. With bands that have me pushing and pulling up to 100 lbs., I am seeing results I’m sure I wouldn’t see otherwise. The core ball has been a game changer for all the ab work. And the step? Well, I’m still trying to make friends with the step. While the rest of the equipment makes the exercises feel easier, the step seems to make everything a bit harder! Not that I’m afraid of hard things but I cannot for the life of me jump onto this six inch high mountain and land on two feet to save my life!! And there’s my coordination issue that is challenging for some step moves. So I modify many of the exercises that use the step. And that’s OK. Because the important thing is to have fun and fun it is!! Nine weeks of work. Five workouts per week. No two workouts are identical so the variety in this program is unmatched. Each workout begins with a twelve minute density round. A shorter round of a complex move. And then tabata cardio. Out of all the cardio exercises I’ve done through the years, tabata rules. The hardest tabata is 20 seconds on and 10 seconds off for four minutes. Not too bad. But the reverse tabata is my fave…10 seconds on , 20 seconds off. Of course it’s not too bad…10 seconds of work is easy!! No wonder it’s my fave! This workout is a bit more advanced but I encourage people of any fitness level to not be afraid of it because the modifications make the harder moves very doable. And the modifier is my favorite. Autumn is a great encourager through every workout but there are many days when I tune my ears to Kat , the modifier. You just can’t go wrong with this one.

So there you go! I know my faves may be completely different than yours. That’s cool! I’d love to know what your faves are if you are a Beachbody person. And results. My results are mine alone and will likely look different than yours. But if you show up for yourself on a consistent basis without giving up, you’ll soon see your own set of results to brag about! If this all sounds fun to you and you’d like to show yourself how wildly capable you are and you need someone to guide your way and encourage your journey, I can help. Just comment and let me know .

Until then, keep joyfully clamoring!

Encouragment, Uncategorized

Silence

December 2, 2021by Becky DyeLeave a Comment

I’ve been so quiet on my blog this past year. I’m not sure I’ve added one brand new post all year long. But you should see my list of started posts. It’s lengthy! Words about travel, faith, health, weight loss, politics, random stories all left unfinished and unpublished for one reason or another. The stopper in me is strong, I tell ya. So it’s amazing to me that my little corner of the written blog world added new subscribers and readers. Thank you new blog reading friends for the attention. It encourages me to write more.

Where to start though after such a long break? As I write this, the Christmas season has begun. I’m deep into both an Advent devotional and a full out Advent bible study. Through this early morning time with my cuppa Christmassy flavored coffee and my bible, I’ve been reminded of a super long break God took from the people many, many years ago. He was silent for 400 years. I can’t even imagine. How many generations felt nothing from God? Not a glance their way. Not a whisper with a comforting word of reassurance.

But God in His infinite greatness had a plan. It was a great plan, perfectly timed. He knew He wouldn’t stay silent forever…though come on. 400 years was plenty of someone’s “forever”. Bless it! He would make His great come back with a baby. A sweet , swaddled up newborn who came to be King. Jesus.

Jesus who would be the Light of the World , the Resurrection and the Life, the King of Kings, the Messiah.

Hold on there! Do you ever see something, hear something , smell something and you’re transported back in time to a memory? Lots of things do that for me. But right now, it’s the words “King of Kings” and “Messiah”. Right there, together, side by side. I have the sweetest childhood memory that involves those words. Let me take you back there with me , Dear Reader.

I was 7 or 8. Maybe 9 or 10. Who knows? It’s been over 50 years and who can remember all the things anymore? I may not remember how old my little self was but I do remember exactly how I felt when my mom asked me to help her play the Hallelujah Chorus for a performance of Handel’s Messiah. My mother has been an incredible organist for as long as I can remember. I was a little girl just beginning to learn to play the piano. But she had full confidence that I could play three little notes for her and be the needed third hand she must’ve desperately needed . Or maybe she could’ve done it and just wanted this mother/daughter moment. Whatever, it was a confidence booster for her novice, nervous piano student.

At any rate, my shy, timid little self (don’t be fooled by this photo that makes me look far more outgoing than I actually was!) set out to make my momma proud playing those three little notes behind the words “KING OF KINGS”. Actually, it was six because those same three notes accompanied the next words in the song, “LORD OF LORDS.” As a full grown adult woman, I sing a lot. Humming around the house, music playing in my home 90% of the day. I can feel confident that this habit likely began in those days when I was practicing for my big Messiah moment with my momma. I can almost hear my little voice, humming or singing the notes that went along with “King of Kings and Lord of Lords.”

Names of Jesus on repeat in my young, impressionable head.

Did my mother know the impact this would have on the entirety of my life? Did I? I don’t know. She was probably hopeful I’d develop a love of piano playing and maybe become a great organist one day. Maybe her love of music would develop in me. I’m certain she was hopeful I’d love Jesus forever. Some of these things stuck.

Jesus. He stuck. In my young and impressionable mind, those weeks of practicing my part in the Hallelujah chorus, singing through those names of Jesus over and over again….it was like the beginning of super gluing Him to my heart. I just wanted to do a good job. I didn’t want to mess up or embarrass myself or my mom. I’m sure that’s all it meant to me at the time . But those words, unbeknownst to myself in those moments, were speaking life into my soul.

The words we say to ourselves have power.

Choose them wisely! Your words to yourself should mimic the words your Creator says about you. You are loved, able, perfectly created, healed, strong, forgiven and so on! And if you’re a parent, choose the words you say to your children even more wisely! They’re gonna stick, whether they’re great affirming words or life sucking words. I say again, choose those words wisely!

I’m so grateful I was raised in a home by parents who loved me and spoke well to me. They never ever even cursed in our presence. But piano seems to be one of those skills you lose if you don’t use it . I recently had the chance to spend an entire week with my parents. Just me and them. It was fabulous. My mom still has a piano in the living room so, of course, I had to sit down on the piano bench and see if any notes would come back to me. I searched Mom’s music for something I could play with my right hand. I can still bang out a pretty decent treble clef only song. I found a hymn…of course…and started playing it. It didn’t take long for my mom to come into the room, taking over that pesky bass clef part that I couldn’t for the life of me play at the same time my right hand was playing. Playing piano with my mom …again. Creating a song together. Another sweet memory. We were both so excited that we could make out the song we were playing in spite of the fact that it’s been a good long minute since I played anything.

I guess I figured out where to start again after my rather long writing break. Jesus is always the right answer! Maybe now I can go back and address all those unfinished blog stories!

Until next time…which I hope is sooner rather than later… keep JOYFULLY clamoring!

Encouragment, parenting

Out of the Mouths of Babes

May 8, 2020May 7, 2020by Becky DyeLeave a Comment

Full disclosure here. What you are about to read is something I wrote six years ago. The actual scene on the toilet happened about three years before that. It’s a memory that always makes me smile and causes me to remember a couple of things: 1) what we allow in our minds will one day come out of our mouths and 2) people are watching us and being influenced by our words and actions whether we know it or not. Be mindful folks!!

If you’ve read this before, I hope you’ll enjoy it once again. If this little story is brand new to you , thanks for taking a few minutes out of your day to go back in time with me!

It was a busy day like all the rest. Meals to prepare. Laundry to finish. Faces to wipe. Diapers to change. Songs to sing. Games to play. Books to read. Crafts to complete. Hugs to give. Learning to guide.

During one of those really busy moments, I heard a sweet little voice coming from the bathroom…

“Mrs. Becky I’m done! Come help me please”

“Just a minute Sweetie. I’ll be there in a second” (I was in the midst of a very important load of laundry, you know!)

So I commenced with my laundry rotation . But because it was so quiet and because my brain was so full of things I needed to get done, instead of going straight to the bathroom to offer whatever assistance little Sweetie needed, I walked into the kitchen to wipe the counters or some other truly unimportant task. Then I heard it. A sound coming from the bathroom….

Leaving a 3 year old in need of assistance in a bathroom could’ve resulted in many different scenarios. There could’ve been toilet paper pulled completely off the roll and scattered all over the floor. There could’ve been hand soap smeared all over the mirror as torrents of water spilled over the sink. There could’ve been other things that were far worse and harder to clean up! But what I found was almost as shocking.

She was sitting on the potty, patiently waiting for me……SINGING! I stood just outside the bathroom door and listened, trying to make out the song she was entertaining herself with. It wasn’t Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. It wasn’t the ABC Song. It wasn’t even Itsy Bitsy Spider. As I tuned up my ears, what I heard nearly brought a tear to my eye……

“Come on and rain down on us. Rain down us Lord.”

Over and over…….

When I opened the door all the way to see this precious angel, she was not only singing this praise song, her hands were in the air and her eyes were closed. I promise…..I’m not making this up!!!

Not your normal every day preschool sing along song but I was deep in the midst of preparing music for a women’s retreat. In trying to learn this new song I would be leading, I played it ad nauseum throughout the day. It was our lunch music. It was our dancing music. We made up hand motions for the song. And within a very short time, not only did I finally know the song, the children I kept during the day obviously had it memorized and were ready to spout it out like a fountain in moments of boredom!

:::S I G H:::

As I think back on this day, it causes me to stop and think of the stuff that flows out of my mouth…especially during those times I’m not getting my way or I’m having to be super patient. Is it as sweet as chocolate flowing from a fountain or is it as smelly and nasty as garbage falling out of a garbage truck hitting a speed bump? Am I singing praises or spouting ugliness? Am I lifting up those around me or crushing their spirits?

Then I have to stop and think….when my responses in times of waiting are , well, less than stellar, what am I filling my head with during the day? Because you know, what goes in, must come out. Sweet chocolate or disgusting garbage.

chocolate_fountain_strawberry_grape_sweet-hd-wallpaper-590449

Mmmmm….I like chocolate sauce!

When the baby just won’t stop crying, am I sitting in a corner crying with him or am I mustering up all the love I can find to bring comfort?

When the teenager is shoveling around an attitude that he surely picked up from who knows where , am I shoveling it back at him or am I responding back with grace and love?

When I’ve waited too long in line and my feet hurt and I can’t stand it one more minute…..or my patience has worn thin…..or it’s just been a long day and I want some quiet…..how am I responding to those who need or even demand my attention? How are YOU?

That initial gut reaction can so quickly become something you’ll regret….something you probably will wish you could take back. When I think of Little Miss Sweetness in the bathroom, she could’ve so easily changed her response to my lack of immediate attention by, oh, I don’t know…playing in the toilet, making a mess of the bathroom, screaming out of impatience, crying from unbearable boredom. But earlier in the day, she had been filled with a simple song that overflowed from her heart and when she needed it most, she reached into her tank

and poured out praise….

she poured out love….

she poured out thankfulness…

I’m gonna close this little blog post with a video. It’s the song we were listening to that day and so many days before then. To this day, every time I hear this song I still think of that sweet baby girl waiting on me ever so patiently, singing like a little angel , praising Jesus in her own way…..from the toilet of all places. And I’m reminded how I need to work on waiting more patiently for attitudes to change , for things to work out as God wants them to, for each storm to pass. And I’m also reminded of how much I need to fill my fountain with good things so that when I need it most, the good things will flow out and splash on everyone within my reach!

Are your fountains flowing out “Chocolate” or “garbage”? Let’s choose chocolate!

Encouragment

Wherein Our Normal Lies

May 7, 2020by Becky Dye1 Comment

I awoke today, not to the sound of my alarm, but to the sounds of my husband in the bathroom. I know he tries to be quiet with his morning routine and I appreciate that! But I still hear him. And that’s OK. He gets up and going at a decent-ish hour on work days so I usually need to be finding my way out of the coziness of the fluffy white blankets by then anyway.

Today, the husband is out of his at- home- upstairs- office with a view of our front yard and back at it in his office 8.9 miles from home. But still with a pretty decent view .

Today it’s back to normal.

As I sat at my end of the table this morning doing my regular morning things, I heard motion upstairs. Soon the 20 year old came down into the kitchen dressed in a nice white button down and navy pants. After a two week “really exposed to COVID” break from work, he left the house and headed to his office this morning as well.

Today it’s back to normal.

What would I do with my “back to normal” self today, I wondered. First on tap, was a trip to Kroger to pick up my Click List and then to Publix to pick up what Kroger didn’t have. Strangely, Kroger had paper towels today but no bacon or sirloin steaks. Since it’s always worth the extra miles to ensure there’s meat in my fridge, I welcomed the drive to an extra grocery store.

This was when it hit me. Just how “normal” was my day…really? First, I greatly dislike going into a grocery store…ever! So the thought of being excited to go to a grocery store, get out of my car, and walk into it was NOT normal. Then the sight of 75% of the people I saw coming in and out of the store wearing masks was NOT normal. For real, did you ever think it would be deemed acceptable to walk into any type of business with a face covering and gloves on your hands and not appear like you were there to rob the place? This may be “normal” today. But this isn’t normal. The way the workers had to back away from the asparagus before I could go near and grab a bundle wasn’t normal. The “go this way but not that way” signs on the floor, directing shoppers down one way aisles, was not normal.

I guess the directional arrows on the floor saved me from my previous “new normal” way of grocery shopping. If I turned down an aisle and there were actual real, live breathing people on BOTH sides of the aisle, I’d have a very definite “may the odds be ever in your favor” moment. I’d stop in front of the spaghettio’s, dead in my tracks, pretending to be fascinated by the wondrous display of canned kid food while I waited for the aisle to clear. But if I found myself forced to wander into the sea of people further down the aisle, I’d hold my breath and do my best to keep my distance. Tell me I’m not the only one!!

So many changes to our normal these days. Just like the directional markings on the grocery store floor, as we re-enter life outside our homes we may feel stuck between the arrows to go this way and the x’s keeping us away. One thing may feel OK for one person while the next person is still fearful. Masks or no masks? Gloves or no gloves? Pick up carry out food at your favorite restaurant , stay there and eat on their patio or simply just keep cooking ALL. THE. MEALS. AT. HOME ! Go to the salon for that much needed hair color or just let it keep getting rootier?

Speaking of salons, I couldn’t take my ridiculous hair another minute! So the second I got the go ahead to come in for my way overdue hair appointment, I jumped at the chance. THAT would feel normal, right? The overgrown hair would be cut to an acceptable length and the grays that had taken over in a most unbecoming way would be returned to their totally natural and normal shade of highlighted brown. That part did, indeed, feel normal. But having to wait outside the salon to have my temperature taken before I entered wasn’t very normal. Neither was the mask I was asked to wear in order to stay inside. I was grateful for the precautions taken so the salon COULD be open, but dang! These things were just so far off normal. I was happy to sit outside while my hair processed so I could remove said mask for a good half hour or so! To the folks who must wear a mask all day long to serve the community in any shape, form or fashion, THANK YOU!!! Seriously! And to the people who walked by me while I was enjoying a shady bench on a sunny day looking like a fridge full of leftovers, thank you for not making eye contact! I hope I didn’t scare your children!

Honestly, though, I’ve never been one who minded changes. Changes keep life from getting boring, right? Plus rolling with the punches life throws has always just seemed easier than resisting them at times. Chances are good the changes will keep coming and we may feel unsteady for a while. Some changes may feel OK. Some may be acceptable if only to keep the old normal things going. Some may feel like a big old NO WAY! One thing I feel certain of is that we’re all going to long for the days of old when we could go to the mall or to a ballgame or even to the grocery store and not have to worry about hand sanitizers and the appropriate face covering.

Another thing I know for sure is that when things feel wobbly and uncertain, it feels great to be able grab tight to something that is secure and solid. It keeps the room from spinning completely out of control. If only we had something in our lives right now that could be that solid, unchangeable bit of security we need. Oh if only we had something like that to hold on to…something completely trustworthy.

Oh wait!

“Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever”…Hebrews 13:8

“For I the Lord do not change; therefore you O children of Jacob, are not consumed.”...Malachi 3:6

“God is not man, that He should lie, or a son of man, that He should change His mind.”…Numbers 23:19

And with these reminders, suddenly this ever changing , wobbly, insecure time we’re in feels better. Because God! He doesn’t change. He’s that steady , solid, unwavering piece of security we so desperately need to grab hold of right now. He’s the one thing we can depend on when the news seems undependable. When we don’t have a clue what or who to trust, we can always trust Him. He’s the direction we need to take , our Perfect Guide. He’s our Protector and our Provider. He makes sure we don’t get consumed so why can’t we just allow Him to do that and stop letting ourselves BE consumed by bothersome things?

He can make the not normal things feel more tolerable.

And with that, all I have left to say is HallelujahThankYouJesus and Have a Good Day!

Until next time…Keep on joyfully clamoring!!!

Encouragment

Let It All Be Joyful!

March 16, 2020by Becky Dye1 Comment

If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, you may be wondering what’s up with my blog name. It may still feel familiar but you smell something different in here!

I recently had a convicting moment in my bible study time. I was challenged to check my motives in the things I do. Just because our motivations start out good doesn’t mean they will always stay good. It’s probably a good idea that we all step back every now and then and make sure we’re still on the right track!

So I took a look at my blog and stopped to think about why I’ve been so inconsistent in writing. Had my good motives of showing how God was working in my life …of bringing Him glory through my stories somehow changed.

What’s next is a hard to admit,true confession…..

What I discovered was…well…a bit more selfish and less than my original motivation. I mostly was keeping “God touches” in my writing but I learned from the likes and comments and views that the more I wrote about the God things, the less attention my blog got. And the less attention I was getting, the more my motivation to write things became smaller.

Did you catch that? The less attention *I** was getting the more I thought “why bother”! And that’s when it hit me. God didn’t ask me to write to show how fabulous I was or to draw attention to myself. He wanted me to write about how He brings joy and hope and love and all the good things into my life. But when what I wrote , whether it focused more on me or on Him, didn’t get the attention I perceived it needed, I took it all personally and withdrew.

My motivation to write somehow became more “how much attention can I get” rather than simply writing what God put on my heart for His glory not mine.

And for this Jesus loving gal, that was a big old OUCH!

So in an attempt to take any focus off me, I’ve changed the title of my blog from My Clamorous Life to simply “JOYFULLY CLAMORING”. Because I really want this to be more about showing the JOY that comes from living a life out loud for the Lord. A life not so much focused on MeMeMe but on how much fun life can be with Him!

I’m human. And I might fall back into needing all the affirmations. And I might write something that is more about me and less about Him. It could happen. I hope not. Because my true intent is to just share what I feel He wants me to. Period. If that moves someone to respond ,whether that response is just for them or they respond to me, it’s all good. My job is simply to be obedient.

To keep JOYFULLY CLAMORING!

Encouragment, Healthy Living

A Work in Progress

March 4, 2020March 5, 2020by Becky Dye7 Comments

Today is a big day. A sweet anniversary. A year ago today God grabbed me and said “I have a better plan!” You see, I had asked him sorta “tongue and cheek” to just make me magically thin and fit after my sister declared on Facebook she was ready to lose weight and get healthy. I knew I needed to do the same thing….but the past 15 years had only proved to me how excruciatingly hard this was! So why not ask God for this little favor! I thought it would be an amazing thing for Him to do. I’d just wake up the next day and be 10 lbs lighter. And as I barely changed my eating habits and continued my crusade to never exercise a day in my life, I’d continue to lose weight like butter slipping off a hot steak. It would be spectacular! After this past year of talking to people on social media who are trying to lose weight, God could stay quite busy helping people achieve their own pre-laid quick weight loss plans! People get so agitated and discouraged if they don’t lose 5 lbs or more a week.

But I digress. Back to God’s better plan! I did truly pray for God to make losing some weight easier for me. I did hope I could lose at super fast lightning speed. Because who doesn’t? I knew,though, I needed a mindset change and that’s what I honestly prayed hardest for. Because I knew that if I woke up every day thinking it was OK to be the “fluffy grandma” , that cookies were life and that sitting on the sidelines watching life pass me by was cool, I’d never ever ever lose weight again. I had to have better thoughts passing through my head.

So I went to bed on February 28,2019 with this prayer on my heart. And when I opened my eyes on March 1st, something was different! No, I wasn’t amazed at my new size 10 body staring at me from my bathroom mirror. The size 20 girl was still there with all her bed head glory. But what lay beneath all that crazy hair was not the same! I can’t explain it beyond God’s miraculous touch, but I knew I knew I knew that all my “I can’t possibly do this” thoughts had left the building and would no longer be an issue.

Could I really “do all things through Christ who strengthens me”? I was about to find out….

So I grabbed my phone and purchased the WW app. I scoured through YouTube for all the Leslie Sansone Walk at Home videos I could find. I threw out all the sugary , yummy junk that was lingering in my pantry. I went to Kroger and filled my buggy with lean meats and fruits and veggies and all the healthy things I once snubbed my nose at. I joined my sister’s Facebook group with others who were trying to commit to new and healthier lifestyles…because accountability is a good thing. Then I set about the business of listening to what God’s better plan was and doing it.

My first big surprise was how easy it all felt . It wasn’t hard to hit play on the walking video and actually spend 30 minutes marching and kicking around my living room. It wasn’t hard to kick the cookies to the curb and eat blueberries instead. It wasn’t hard to tell people “no thank you” when they offered me a piece of cake because they knew I always wanted cake! None of it was hard. And that was weird and so amazing.

“The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; His mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning.”…Lamentations 3:22-23

Part of His better plan for me was to teach me this. His mercies truly never end. It’s been an every morning thing. I go to bed each night unaware of what the next day will bring. But God knows. So He wraps up the strength I’ll need to make healthy food choices all day. He boxes up the stamina I’ll need make it through the harder workouts. He ties up all the positive words I need to say to myself. Then when I wake up in the morning, He hands them all to me…a new gift each and every morning.

So by this point, you must be wondering if doing all these things with my new “Jesus super powers” made everything so super easy that I reached all my goals at the exact time I wanted to reach them and never struggled.

And the answer to that is a big fat nope!!! God promised His forever presence with us. But He never promised us His presence would make life super easy with every single thing going just like we want. Over the course of this last year , some things have happened exactly like I wanted them to….like losing 30 lbs in the 3 months before our fancy Alaskan cruise. The picture above of my husband and I was taken on that vacation. We were standing in our “adventure cart” on a mountain trail in Ketchikan, Alaska. SO! MUCH! BEAUTY! Let me just stop here and say if you ever have the chance to go to Alaska, don’t think twice about it. Just go! Best as I could figure, losing 30 lbs would be a reasonable 3 month goal and it would be just enough to make me more comfortable with all the vacation things we’d be doing. And I was right. By June 15th , I had lost 33.5 lbs. Because God sometimes like to show us how He is able to do abundantly more than all we ask or think, simply because He loves us.

After those first three months of abundance , I had new lessons to learn. And the biggest thing God had for me was wrapped up in the s l o w n e s s of the weight loss I would have for the remainder of the first year. I lost 33.5 in the first three months. Over the next NINE months ( and to this very day), I would lose only 32 more pounds. The tail end of my first year of weight watching was full of plateaus, roller coasters… gaining and losing the same 3 or 4 pounds over and over. I’m telling you, a weaker person would’ve just said “Hallelujah for those first 30 pounds but this is for the birds” and thrown in the towel.

Now I’m human. And even though I had given God control of this venture into “healthierness”…yes,that’s a word and I just made it up and it’s good…I still felt big needs to help Him speed things up when the wheels started screeching on my weight loss. So I changed my WW plan . I changed my exercise program.

And ya know what?

I kept losing weight! Yay me!!

You wanna also know what?

My efforts didn’t speed up a thing! Yep. In spite of all my incredible efforts to get to my goals and reach the end of this race quicker , I was still barely losing 1/2 a pound a week. What the heck was going on?? I had accepted the fact that I was gonna lose slowly because of my age and I was OK with that. But this just seemed excruciating. I needed to have another serious chat with my Leader about this.

It went something like this…..

Me: “Hey God! I know You’re for me and with me and all that but I’m just wondering if You , for some reason, have put my request to lose all this weight on Your back burner. I still have a good 15-20 to go and I’m not even losing a pound a week. This is gonna take forevah!!” (insert semi-frustrated grunt here)

God: “Take heart, Sweet Girl, and wait for me. Be strong. I am making you strong now. Don’t you feel that?”

Me: “Yes! I’m so much stronger. I DO feel that. Have You seen that I’m lifting heavier weights now? And I’m doing real burpees! I still can by pass the cookies and cake but even if I have just a bite, that sugar monster You helped me slay stays asleep!! Seriously!! But I really thought I’d be at my goal weight and coasting through maintenance by this point. I need help to not just grow tired of this!”

God: ” What you are doing is a good thing. You’ve made so many positive changes . Continue to use my strength to help you not grow weary in doing these good things. And at the proper time, you will reap the harvest of your efforts because you did not give up. Remember that My timing is perfect even when it’s not the same as what you’d like.”

Me: ” Oh I know!! I won’t forget that. But I’m still an impatient human, just like You created me. I also know to You a day is like a thousand years and that makes me a tad bit nervous! Please please please tell me I’ll reach my goals quicker than that!!”

God: “Stay faithful to the good things I’ve taught you this year. Let your perseverance finish its work . You don’t want to reach your goal prematurely. Let all you’ve learned and accomplished come to completion so that you won’t be lacking anything. When you feel frustrated , like you don’t know what you’re doing anymore, come to Me. I love to help. I won’t look down on you or think you’re weak. I’ll just help you. Ask boldly and then believe without a second thought that I will help you.”

Me: “So if I do these things I don’t see how I can help but reach my goals. In Your time and in Your way. I will wait patiently. I will stay steady and strong. One good decision after another. One at a time. “

And that my Friends, I guess is the secret to my success over this past year and into the years to come. By my own power , I’m a mess. With God leading the way, I at least stand a pretty darn good chance of getting what I truly need. Healthy weight loss….not super fast, at the speed of light loss. A mind set that is changed for the good and for the better because anything that is slowly simmered is superior to something quickly boiled into a mushy mess.

I’m still a work in progress and will continue to be.

Until next time, keep JOYFULLY CLAMORING!

Encouragment, parenting

Doing Christmas Well When All the Kids are Adulting

December 13, 2019by Becky Dye1 Comment

I look around my house at all the signs of Christmas approaching. The tree in the corner brightly lit. The garland on the mantle with stockings hung with care underneath. The wreaths on the front door and windows. Scattered nativities to remind us of the birth of Christ. Snowmen to remind us there’s rarely any blasted snow in Georgia!! Gosh, that reminds me of the Christmas my #4 kid was three years old. First, we had to wake him up on Christmas morning to run downstairs for present time. What three year old has to be woken up on Christmas morning? And second, he thought we were fooling him that it was Christmas because when he ran to the window he saw no snow! And how could it be Christmas without snow?? Little goof ball actually climbed back into bed!! Oh my! He’s gotten used to brown grassy Christmas time in the 18 years that have passed since that morning! We just live in a big snow-less bubble!!

In spite of the fact that I have seven whimsical stockings hanging, each with their own child appealing design on the front, all five of our kids have grown up and are adulting like bosses these days. Yes, these are the stockings I purchased at Michael’s back in 1998. Yet every year I have this inner debate with myself over whether or not to gift these stockings to their much older owners or just continue the tradition of hanging them in order on our mantle. Each year, “continue the tradition” seems to be the winner. Because as non-traditional as I am sometimes….as much as I attempt to live in each present moment…these stockings are the holder of so many Christmas memories from the childhood of my five. And I hang on to them. Why not? I loved Christmas with my own 5-pack of adorable kidlets at home. I miss it to be honest. Christmas isn’t the same without the pitter patter of their little feet racing to the tree on Christmas morning.

It’s just not. Not whining here. Just stating facts and all!

With that said, while I embrace the memories held in each Santa stocking, I am also learning to embrace each new moment of Christmas-ing with my adult kids. We’ve had to start new traditions. Sometimes each year has been the beginning of a new tradition….no biggie! We’ve had to bend a bit. That’s OK…God made us flexible on purpose! But all this has lead to doing Christmas well with these amazing grown up people!

So I don’t stomp my feet and insist on having Christmas my way!! I cringe at the thought of creating that much stress for my family!! Stress is born when a momma holds on too tightly to wanting all the Christmas things to remain the same year after ever-lovin’ year !!! That would get boring, right? But I’m not gonna lie. If I could have all my babies and their babies under my roof every merry Christmas Eve night , I would be happy as a kid who just found Santa’s workshop! But the last thing I want to do is put pressure on my sweet things who are trying to make more people happy than just me. So come here New Way of Doing Christmas! Let me give you a big old hug!

I’ve also found this year the need to be more flexible with the day and time of our family celebrations. We celebrated Thanksgiving the weekend before Turkey Day because of conflicting work schedules. It felt a bit weird in the planning but when that Sunday came, I found a Macy’s parade on YouTube that we watched , the Cowboys were playing football and nothing about the day felt less than completely Thanksgiving-y! Tiny changes in our Christmas celebration will happen as well because sometimes ya gotta share your people. And that’s OK! Sharing is caring and all that. I think we all learned that when we were kids!

Truth is, though, I’m not certain if I’ll ever stop missing my kids being little at Christmas. Not a Christmas has gone by since my kids started growing up and adulting that I haven’t had at least one “moment” in my darkened living room as I sat basking in the glow of the lights from the tree. A cozy fire roaring in the fireplace. A lone tear escaping my eyes. Memories flooding back of my own childhood Christmases, blurring lines with remembrances of the joy I felt each Christmas with my own small children.

Have you ever done this? If you have, know it’s OK because now you know at least one more person who does the same. We don’t ever want to forget the good memories we made with our young families. But living in the moment as we build new memories is honestly just as amazing. I can look forward to each new Christmas no matter how we “do” it. The other night, my man and I hopped in the car by ourselves with no children buckled in anywhere and toured the neighborhoods in our town so we could ooo and aah at their spectacular light displays.

I also bought Christmas cards for the first time in a bazillion years. Pictured on our” re-entrance to holiday card sharing ” is just me and my man. Just us. None of our kids. None of our grandkids. Felt weird…but also very accepting of our empty-ish nest status.

I’ve known forever that Christmas isn’t about the things we do to bring on the Christmas feels. I’ve known forever that the true meaning of Christmas is Jesus….God sending His Son as an adorable baby with a mission to be our Savior. So part of doing this Christmas season well is letting my focus be more on that and less on what my now vintage stockings remind me I’m missing.

Because even in the memories of “1990’s and 2000’s Christmas” is Jesus. In the “right now Christmas” is Jesus. He’s the only thing with any amount of consistency. He’s always the right answer. Especially when the house is too quiet. And when our row at church, which used to hold all seven of us, feels empty. When we’re singing Christmas carols off key by ourselves. And when those grown up kids we love so much may not even see in person the stockings we hung just for them. Jesus is in it all. Always and forever.

So Merry Christmas to the young and those who will always be young at heart. Happy Holidays to one and all.

Until next time, keep clamoring with all the holly jolly you have!